After my last post (with regard to the miraculous gifts) evanmay made the comment, ‘We should be open to and seek the miraculous, but we should not neglect to thank the Spirit for the ways he gifts his church that seem ordinary.’ The first part of the sentence is what caught my attention, because it touches on another issue that’s been floating around in my mind: the giving and receiving of the gifts.
Please bear with me if my questions here seem simplistic and practical, but I simply haven’t moved in charismatic circles enough to know anything about this. We know that we are to eagerly desire the gifts… but what does that mean, really? If the giving of the gifts is truly the work of a sovereign God (which no one here would deny), then how does one ‘desire’ them in an ‘effective’ way (or is there an effective way)?
I have prayed to God many times, asking him for more of the Spirit. I have acknowledged to God that my position on this issue is underdeveloped–I am totally open to the possibility of the sign gifts continuing on even now, but I remain unconvinced. I know I want to prophesy… I know that if it means I experience more of the Spirit, then I want to speak in tongues, too. Is that fulfilling the command to ‘desire’ the gifts, or is there something more?
Here’s the big question I’m getting at: Do I need to be entirely convinced of the reality of the ongoing nature of the gifts in order to receive them? Why would God wait till someone is totally convinced before giving them the experience of prophecy? Why wouldn’t he give me a prophecy first so that I would know for certain that is the Lord speaking? I know that I would be convinced by a genuine experience of such a miracle…
If I am open to the Lord’s working in my life in this way, and desirous of experiencing him in every appropriate way, is that enough? Or do I need to be fully convinced that tongues continue before I speak in tongues? I don’t know of a biblical text to which I can directly refer, since obviously everyone at that point believed in the presence of the miraculous gifts at that point.
Is it wrong to desire something I’m not convinced is biblical? Is it wrong to seek an experience in order to validate theology?
Anyone got any practical suggestions?